Listen To Me Ramble About My Kids...

Jennifer’s sister Stephanie had a baby about last October, and this weekend Jennifer and Izzy went to Florida to participate in baby Sophie’s christening.  Since that meant the BOYS would rule the house, we moved the video games downstairs onto the good tv (as opposed to my late grandmother’s 20 year old console model in the attic), we ate pizza, popcorn and generally have had fun. 

(In the picture below, ERIC is actually playing H3 on the xbox360, Jake’s participating imaginatively with an xbox controller)

Note that Jake is wearing his Ninja Suit.  When he’s wearing it, he demands to be called “Ninja Boy”, not “Jake”.  I call him “Nuts”.  Unfortunately, the Curse of The Puking Kid struck again last night, with Jake coming upstairs to spew on me.  Luckily, he was fine this morning, so maybe it was just something strange he ate.  Then, this afternoon, Eric came home with a 100 degree fever, sniffles, etc.  Hopefully he’ll be better before Jennifer (and her parents) get home next week.

Why do the kids always get sick with ME?  I’m going out of town next time one of them starts feeling poorly.

I saw this over at my internet friend Carol’s space, so I thought I’d join in (it’s helping me to avoid work). 

I got this mug in 1995, when I was working as a programmer for a company called Info Systems of North Carolina.  My manager at the time was a really nice lady who would get kind of irritated at me every once in a while, because she said I was an “Administrative Nightmare”.  I have no idea what she was talking about.

Today was Young Author’s Day at Eric, Alex and Jake’s school.  Since Jake is in kindergarden, he didnt participate, but Eric and Alex did.  I got to hear both boys read their stories, and that was nice.  The not so nice part was having to sit through all the OTHER kids stories too, because while I like kids and they were all very excited to have the parents there…other kid’s stories just aren’t all that interesting.  I’m sure its because my kids are the smartest, most fun, and best writers in their whole class.

Eric’s story was about how he woke up one morning, and his bed was on Mars.  There were aliens.   Eric’s got the best imagination of any 10 year old I’ve ever met, and I would love to read his stories, even if I didn’t have to like them.

Alex’s story was about how he rode Mission:Space at Disneyworld.  Luckily, he didn’t mention the part about me almost throwing up.  While I liked that part, I noticed when he was getting up to read his story that he neglected to wear underpants (If you’re not a parent, you wont understand how I knew that, but if you are, you will, because you have “Daddy Radar” too (or Mommy radar, which is the same, only more attuned to uncombed hair and other fripperies)).  I almost stood up and said “WHY ARE YOU NOT WEARING UNDERPANTS???” in front of everyone, but I restrained myself.  I don't know WHY he hates to wear them so much.  He’s a weirdo.

Even though having to sit through all of the other kids stories was kind of lame, I love going to see them do well in school.  Now I just have to fix it so the Assistant Principal never has to call me because they get caught pulling shenanigans.

When Jenny is out of town, I sleep up in the attic, mainly because I don't want my computer to feel lonely.  Sometimes, I end up with extra people in bed with me, but that’s ok.   I don’t really discourage it, because I know that it wont be long until they’re too old to want to be with me (I’m a horrible pushover).  Last night though, I woke up at about 4:00 with no one in bed with me, but I heard Izzy hollering “DADDDY……..DADDY……..DADDY”.  I went downstairs to tell her to ZIP IT, but she wasn't in her room.  She wasn't in the master bedroom either.  I heard her again from downstairs, so I went down only to find her standing on the counter next to the refrigerator with chocolate all over her mouth.  It seems she used a chair to climb up on the counter to get at the Easter candy that’s on top of the refrigerator, ate all she wanted, and then found out she couldn't get down. 

She wouldn't go back to sleep either, so I’m sure I’ll be cranky today.  Dammit.

The only reason I didn't get too mad at her is because she’s so cute.  This pic is her in the ballerina dress she got.  Note the shoes.

It was getting close to bedtime, so I said to Izzy “It’s almost time for bed!”.  She replied, in her Darth Vader voice, “I will destroy you”.

Jake!

We’re having family come for Easter this weekend:  My favorite one of Jenny’s cousins,  Tomi, came yesterday and her sister, nephew, and sister’s new boyfriend are coming tomorrow, so we’ll have a nice Easter dinner.  The kids are all excited too, because Spring Break started yesterday, and runs until next Friday.  (Why they didnt just have all next week off instead of one day this week and 4 days next week is beyond me, but I haven’t head the opportunity of getting an Education degree, so I don’t know why they decided that). 

Last night we had a nice cookout, with brats and hamburgers on the grill, the kids really liked it.  Right before dinner, though, Jake came and kind of nonchalantly told me that he swallowed a quarter.  When I asked why in the world he would do that, he said that he put it in his mouth to see if he could keep from swallowing it.  I guess he failed.   Because he’s so tiny (he weighs about 42 pounds, which is kind of scrawny for a 6 year old – he weighs about as much as Alex’s arm), I called the doctor’s office, and they said he should have an xray to make sure everything was headed in the right direction.   Luckily, there’s an urgent care near our house, and it wasn't TOO full, so we didn’t have to wait long to get an xray that showed that he had, in fact, eaten a quarter.  When the nurse asked why he ate it, he said “I didn’t EAT it, I SWALLOWED it.”, as if that made it ok.  The doctor told us that we should make sure that it comes out, and while I maintain that’s a pink job, Jenny assured me that it was part of my purview.  Examining poop to see if it has coins in it is one of those things they didn’t mention in “What to Expect When You’re Expecting”. 

I’m going to save the quarter and give it to Jake at the Rehearsal Dinner before his wedding.  I’ll make sure to tell everyone the story too.

A few years ago when I went to Washington to see AOL, I went to the Steven F. Udvar-Hazy Center and had a great time.  Last week, I had a morning free, so I went back with a better camera, and took some more pictures.  I don’t know what the fascination of the place is, but to see all of the old airplanes up close is really interesting.  I guess it’s a guy thing…we like to see stuff that goes fast or blows up, and if something will go fast AND blow up, that’s at least twice as much fun.  Since the last time I went, they moved some things around and got some new exhibits, like an F-35 and a Sikorsky UH-34D, but I also got a chance to take some nice pictures of the famous old stuff, like a SR-71 and the Enola Gay.  Next time I go, I want to go downtown and take some pictures at the main National Air and Space Museum. 

I put the whole collection up on flickr.

I went to Washington DC to visit some customers this past week, and I was lucky enough to have some time between meetings, so I decided to go and see Arlington National Cemetery.  It was a beautiful day, and the cemetery is very moving, if you’re into that sort of thing.  One of the most interesting things I got to see was the changing of the guard at the Tomb of the Unknowns, where unidentified soldiers from World War I and World War II are interred.  To honor those soldiers, a guard is kept on duty, in 30 minute shifts, 24 hours a day.

President Kennedy and his brother Robert are also buried there, along with thousands of soldiers, from the Civil War up to today.  While I was there, a funeral for another soldier was held, and the caisson carrying him went by while I was walking out.  It was very moving.

I took about 300 pictures there, some of the ones I like the best are over at flickr.

After raining every day for the past two weeks (it seems), it was finally sunny today.  We didn’t do anything special in it, we just played outside for a while.  Jake and Izzy had a great time, although Eric and Alex couldn't participate because they had to clean their rooms (we’re the MEANEST PARENTS EVER for making them do that).  Next week I’m going to Washington for a change, while Jenny stays home with the kids.  I’m going to laugh as I walk out the door.

Just a few minutes ago, Convict (* see below) came up to the attic where Eric and I were playing videogames and he was crying that fake “I want to avoid going to bed by getting sympathy” cry and said “I’m hurt”.  So I said

“How’d you get hurt?”

“I fell off my desk”

“WHY were you on your desk?” 

“I wanted to see if I could climb to the top, and then I fell off”

“Well, stop doing that”

“OK”

Then he went back downstairs.  He’s nuts.  I’m thinking about modifying the “don’t come out of your room” rule; instead of having the exception “Unless you have to go to the bathroom or get hurt”, I’ll have “Unless you have to go to the bathroom or get hurt AND ARE BLEEDING”, but I don’t think he’d hesitate to draw blood.

* he’s called that now because he got in trouble at school again, and was confined to his room the other day.  I took all of the toys and stuff out so he couldn’t have any fun.  He didn’t like it, hopefully enough that he’ll quit getting in trouble at school.

Well, the best thing I can say about today is that it’s Friday.  It’s kind of rainy and gross out, and it seems to have affected my mood.  Hopefully it will get better soon,  I’m supposed to have a date tomorrow night with Jennifer, maybe that will cheer me up.

Sorry to be such a downer today, here’s a picture of the cutest girl in the world to make up for it.  I took it last night when she was having a bath.

One of the ways that schools have changed since I was a kid is that they have fundraisers about every other month, instead of once a year.  It’s kind of a drag too.  Usually, I’ll buy one of whatever it is they’re selling (usually it’s coupon books, wrapping paper, popcorn, or something like that), but I don’t really encourage the kids to sell to others is because it’s annoying. 

This month, the school had a walkathon to raise money, and they had prizes for the kids who raised the most money.  Eric and Jake both kind of wandered around complaining about how much work it would be to find sponsors, but Alex got on the phone and started calling people:  my parents, Jenny’s parents, my sisters, Jenny’s sisters, friends, friends of friends, etc, etc.  It turns out that he got more pledges than anyone else at the school, and got a scooter for his work.

It’s good to be an extrovert sometimes, because he really seemed to be energized by getting the pledges.  I see a bright future in sales for him.

It finally started snowing, I think this is going to be a good one.  Here’s the forecast:

And here’s what it looked like out front a while ago:

And it’s still coming down… they haven't called school off yet, but I’m sure they will pretty soon.

Today, Jake turned six.  Sometimes, I feel like their lives are flying right by, because he was just born a couple of days ago (it seems). He was sick a lot when he was a baby and toddler, but now he’s easily the most active of our kids.  He never stops, and he’s always into something.  Sometimes, that gets him in trouble, but he’s always good for a hug if you feel bad, and he’s always happy to see you, no matter what kind of day he’s had.  He’s really smart, and he’ll talk your ear off about anything that crosses his mind.  He’s had some adjustments to make since he’s started kindergarten, because sometimes his ideas aren’t the same as the teacher’s ideas, and that can cause some friction.  Like Alex, he’s pretty extroverted, and sometimes that means that they’ll fight more than the other kids.  Deep down, they really love each other. (Sometimes you have to look really deep down, but I’m sure it’s in there.  somewhere)

He got some good presents, even Eric and Alex chipped in and got him stuff.  He got to pick out his very own cake too, so he chose the one with the most colors on it.  For his birthday dinner, he wanted hamburgers on the grill and butter noodles, which we made.  Grilling in the pouring rain was kind of a drag, but he was very specific about what he wanted.

Today we didn’t do a lot, because it’s been RAINING all day.  We went to the store and got a cake, and we spent a lot of time with the weather report, because we’re supposed to get THREE TO FIVE INCHES of snow tomorrow night.  It’s like Christmas is coming again, the kids are beside themselves.   They haven’t called school off yet, but I bet they do before tomorrow evening.

I hope everyone’s having a good weekend, and if you’re in the Charlotte area, make sure you GO TO THE STORE AND BUY MILK AND BREAD!!!  In our last neighborhood, I told my neighbors that I didn’t run out to buy all that stuff because I had a gun, and I’d just come and get their food if I got hungry.  Now you know why none of my neighbors liked me.  They like me in this neighborhood, because I haven't told them that I’m going to take their stuff in the event of an emergency; it will be our little secret!

I usually don’t post random video clips, but I like this one, and its my blog, so I can do whatever I want.

When I got her dressed, it was in real clothes, real underwear, etc.  At nap time, she decided to put on a pullup and get rid of everything else except for the beret.  Tonight was bath night, so all of the drawing she did on herself is gone now too.

I haven’t updated in a while, things here have been really hectic:  Jenny was out of town last week and the week before, and this weekend she’s been in Florida helping her parents and sister with an antique show.  I’m about kidded out, so I’m saving this picture to show Jenny what it would be like if I were a single parent.

Remember a few weeks ago when Izzy found a sharpie and decorated her walls?  It turns out she decorated her Mermaid Barbie too.  I think she’s going to be a Goth.

I had a nice lengthy post I was going to put up about this, but Jenny came home, so we have to talk some.  We’re considering our options for psychological counseling for Izzy.

Today’s winner of the “throw up on Daddy” contest is (drumroll please…) Izzy!  She’s pitiful.

I can tell she’s really sick (I mean, other than by picking the chunks out of my hair) because she’s just lying in bed next to the computer in the attic sleeping, and usually she’s running all over the place.  I hope she feels better soon, she can’t keep anything down, so I’m afraid she’ll get dehydrated..

This week Jenny’s been in Seattle, learning some stuff, and then joining her friend Robyn for her 38th birthday.  It’s good that she’s getting promotions and all that, but after a few days of her being gone, I miss her.

WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!

At least it was 66 today, so I was able to open the windows and get some fresh air into the house.  I forced the kids to go outside and play for a while too, instead of just playing video games all day.  I’m SO MEAN.  Al’s buddy Lauren is spending the night, so they’re downstairs watching Hannah Montana and stuff like that.  I made them agree to stay away from the attic before I’d allow it.

This was my “picture of the day”.  It’s Jenny’s side of the bed.  It’s very empty.

Jenny doesn’t trust me to dress the children properly when she’s out of town.  I have no idea why, but now before she leaves, she gets clothes out for Jake and Isabel and puts them in little stacks.  Today, Jake’s clothes were a nice pair of pants and a turtleneck with a sweater to go over it (because it was NINETEEN DEGREES this morning, which is ridiculous).  Anyway, the whole ‘layers’ thing was kind of new to Jake, and sometimes new things confuse him.  I had to explain to him that you put the turtleneck shirt on first, and then the sweater over it, to keep you warm.  He thought that was backwards, and you should put the warmest thing on FIRST.  I told him to stop yapping and get dressed, so he could get on the bus.

When he got home this afternoon, I noticed that he didnt have his sweater.  I figured he put it into his backpack and didnt think too much of it, until I saw that he seemed kind of THICK.  (the boy weighs about 40 pounds, so he looked NORMAL).  I asked what he was wearing, and he showed me: 

He said he LIKES it that way.  I bet his teacher thinks we’re a bunch of idiots. 

(and this is the picture that my wife always refers to when I ask why she insists on laying clothes out for them.  I don’t know what she’s talking about, it’s not like we were going to church or something)

are the ones you didn’t know were coming!!

The kids are still asleep, but they’re going to flip out when they see this.  It doesn’t look like we got a whole lot, but they wont care…

(shameless parental bragging below.  you can skip if you like)

Eric’s a really smart kid (he gets that from me), but sometimes he gets in trouble at school because he has kind of a lackadaisical attitude towards turning stuff in and completing homework (he gets that from Jenny).  So anyway, he had all sorts of problems last year that we finally got straightened out by the end of the year, but he missed some basic math.  When this year started, he was doing 2 digit multiplication in is head, but he’d sometimes mess something trivial up, and since he didn't know how to do the problem on paper, he wouldn't catch the mistake and would get the problem wrong.  When that was coupled with forgetting his homework on occasion, he ended up with an F in math during the first grading period, and an F is a major problem.  After some review work though, he got an A this marking period, and his teacher is happy with him.

Jenny and I are really happy too.  We’re taking him to the circus this weekend as a reward (well, it’s also for Alex’s birthday, but Eric didn't necessarily have to come)

(He still forgets to hand in his homework sometimes.  We’ll get to that later)

One of the things that the kids don’t like about when Jenny goes out of town is that we have “Daddy Meals” which are heavy on the sandwiches and light on warm things.  Today, to prove to them that I’m not completely useless in the kitchen, I made chicken and rice:  I cut up some chicken, cooked it in a pan, and then cooked some rice and then dumped the chicken into it with a can of cream of chicken soup.  With some corn on the side and toast, it made a great dinner…and they even ate all of it; Eric asked for seconds.  Cleaning it up was a pain in the butt though, so I think tomorrow we’ll be back to oatmeal and PB&J.

This is the other thing that I do when Jenny is gone.  I don’t really mind washing dishes, but laundry is a drag.  I’d just leave it and let Jenny deal with it when she got home, but a) that wouldn’t be nice and b) I don’t want the kids to smell at school.

I hope everyone’s having a good week and staying warm; although spring will be here soon, I’m still hoping for more snow.

I got used to Jenny being here, and now she left again.  She’s going to be gone a lot in February too, so I suppose I should get used to it.  It’s kind of a drag, but I guess you do what you have to do, right?

Anyway, I went to Hickory to see my mom and dad this weekend, with Eric and Jake, because my sister was there with Eric’s FAVORITE cousin Will.  They had a great time.  My mom and dad are going to the Cayman islands for a couple of weeks, so I had to go and see them in case their plane crashes or something.  Today we didn’t do a whole lot except clean up and hang around the house.  Tomorrow school is out, so I’m just going to work from home and throw food down to the kids every once in a while.  I have a one on one with my new manager too, so I’ll have to lock the kids in the garage or something while I’m on the phone.  I’m lucky that the kids are now just about old enough for me to be able to threaten them and make them BE QUIET when I need them to be.

I like this picture of Izzy, even though you can’t see her face.  She’s so cute!

This is what she’s like most of the time.  

Since Monday was MLK day, Tuesday was a snow day, and Friday was supposed to be a school holiday (it wasn’t, because of the snow day) I’m not really sure what day it is.  The only notable activities so far this week have been that Jake got in another fight at school (with the same kid as before) so today he had to suffer the indignity of getting suspended from the bus.  He’s spent the last couple of days in his room, which he HATES, so I hope that it gets through to him that he’s not supposed to smack anyone just for calling him a bad name.

I took this picture this morning, I got a book on amateur astronomy, I think I’ll get obsessed with that too.  I get obsessed with stuff easily.